I haven’t gotten much sleep since April of last year. A lot has been weighing on my mind. I’ve always been a private person, which is funny considering the profession that I’m in and the amount of social networking that I have to do. In fact, I didn’t even have a Facebook account til recently. Every night when my brain jolts me wide awake after only an hour of sleep, a million thoughts run through my mind and it goes into overdrive. Am I where I’m suppose to be? Is this what I’m suppose to be doing with my life? What can I do to give back? How can I be a better person? What’s the right decision? The list goes on…
I know a lot of you out there are going through major changes in your lives right now, including some really close friends. I want you to know that you’re not alone. Things are always scary in the midst of it all and it’s confusing. You wish that you could see into the future and things were concrete. As hard as it may be, sometimes you just have to endure and believe that things will work out as they should. The universe wants the best for us, God wants the best for us. There are always signs around us, you just have to pay attention and do the best that you can.
Like for example, I didn’t realize that I wanted to be a photographer til 5 years ago. But as I look back upon my life, the signs have always been there…I just ignored it.
My real dad was a photography enthusiast. (Granted, I’ve only met him 3 times. He had a camera every in his hand every single time. This was before everyone carried digital cameras.)
In elementary school, I used to dress my sister up to take pictures of her. (I remember one time she refused to pose how I wanted her so I told her that I wasn’t going to take any more photos of her. Hahaa) Most of her childhood photos are taken by me.
For one of my birthdays, I asked for a fully manual film SLR camera.
In college, I took a couple of photography classes.
In my early 20′s, I camped out in the woods of South Carolina for 2 weeks to take pictures of woodpeckers for a researcher. (My photo was published in the New York Times.)
If you’re struggling to find your true calling in life, don’t give up. As we get older we get caught up in the cycle, trying to make rent/mortgage. Most of us will never get a chance to discover what our bliss is, but it’s not too late. Think back to when you were young, what did you just love to do? If money wasn’t an issue, what would your ideal job be?
If you’re into photography now and are struggling to make it work, hang in there. Analyze what you’re doing, what’s working and what’s not working? Trust your instincts. Shoot what you love. Don’t try and chase the money, the money will come if you truly love what you’re shooting. If you’re still having a hard time, hit me up and we’ll sit down over coffee (even though I don’t drink coffee) and we can have a brainstorming session. If there’s a lot of request for this, I’ll do a big group session.
If you’re in a relationship that has come to it’s end, know that you both will be okay. You’ve grown as far as you can with your partner, do not let fear keep you. You are not a failure. It’s not a matter of who’s at fault. A friend sent this to me, Unconscious Uncoupling. Your relationship, while it lasted, was wonderful, was beautiful, was something that you want to remember, don’t let the separation tear away all the fond memories and the good times that you had together. If you’re not sure if you should move on, trust your intuition, pay attention to the signs the universe is showing you. It’s the year of the Dragon, which represents change and mobility. It’s a year for changes, changes for the better.
It will take time. It will not be easy. If it was, we’d all sleep like babies.